excuse me, did you sign up for the fight?

"the nights you fight best

are

when the kiss of death is mistaken for love.

when the game is fixed,

when the crowd screams for your blood.

the nights you fight best

are 

on a night like this

as you chase a thousand 

dark rats from your brain,

as you rise up against the impossible,

as you become a brother

to the tender sister

of joy and 

move on

regardless."

--C.B.

what drives us to the edge? when all the chips are stacked against us, where we have seen enough darkness, kissed death on the lips, tasted the bitter end, to the point where we must change. no, we have to change, everything; our habits, our goals, our lives.

with maturity has come this new attitude of becoming lost in the chase, instead of having to prove myself with a "see me" attitude, i chase a dream that is mine alone. i get lost in the story of me, sometimes i just get lost in a sea of what i think i want, what i wish i had and how happy i think i would be if i had it all. i recently had to sit down and reattach my goals with my dreams. i envision a life that is possible, that is tangible and that i can touch. and everyday, every single day that passes, is an opportunity to seize all that i can out of it, to truly chase the dream or to let it slip away into the arms of someone who wants it more than me. because that is the true test. do you really want it? 

as children we all wanted that "toy" and we wanted it so bad. it was March, your birthday was months away, Christmas even further but we swore to our parents, buy it for me now and i won't want anything else. but by the time december rolls around we already want the next big thing. that is what i am talking about. i have heard the speech, from clients, friends even family members about what we want, where we want to be but the real question is how bad are you willing to fight for it and what are you willing to give up for that dream? it is not just something you see someone else doing that you want too, it is part of who you are and without it, your life would cease to be as it is. this is what i am talking about. these goals, these dreams.

i found my dreams, i wrote them out in my vision and i turned them into my goals. they wake me up with a little more purpose, help me to stay in the "fight" when all i want to do is eat my face off and push the snooze button another time. one day these goals will become not just a vision that i had, but a reality of a life that i have welcomed and am ready to embrace. i am here to be a light even when all else is dark, to shine bright and to love all those that i come into contact with. what are you doing?

Movement

Movement comes from intention. Each action that you take, each opportunity is all part of a grand plan but it lies within that intention. I always tell students to set an intention before they begin practice. Why do we intend to practice yoga? There was a time in each of our lives where yoga was nonexistant. Why did we start yoga? Why did we come back? There was some action behind each visit to the studio. That action starts to change as time passes. Sometimes you stop practicing yoga. Maybe you have never stopped. Either way, you have changed. Your intention, needs to change with you. It needs to guide your practice, your life and each moment.

What prevents us from accomplishing our goals? Do we intend to succeed or fail? I see people come take class to lose weight, but it goes beyond one hour of work. As you leave the studio your mind goes back to old habits of eating, old habits of sitting around and staying inactive. You drink too much, snack until the box is empty and maintain habits that are covering up the truth that your unhappy with more than just your weight. Intention is not about what you say, it is about what you think. When no one else is looking, when your in the deepest, darkest place where your mind goes. 

Setting an intention relies on us settling in to who we are, where we want to go and how we get there. Our intention supports that and keeps us on track for our goals, dreams and ambitions. I strive to be on the top of my game at all times, I know there are times I need to retreat and back off, giving myself time alone to recharge. That drive is what fuels me to be who I am today. I want to be an example of what a true yogi is. I want to teach a class that would develop even the most advanced yogi. I want to be part of an elite group of teachers that can teach anyone, anywhere and with any. I strive to not be the best teacher at a studio, to have the most people in class, I strive to be better than that. It is not about who follows you, how many people think your awesome. It is about the imprint that I leave on your life when you walk out of my class. It is the imprint that I share with you through my life experiences. I want to constantly move toward those goals. I want students that support that goal, friends that inspire me and challenge that greater good in me.

I have set this blog up so that I can support that goal. As it is here for you, it is about me sitting down each week and putting something down. I have to support my practice, my learning and this is my way of staying on track. I challenge you to do the same. Find your intention, find your goals and then stay on track. Each day needs to support that goal, that dream and form who you are.